Father forgive them, for i cannot.

This morning on my way to work, I was listening to a  BBC program that interviewed a young woman who had both her hands chopped off when she was twelve.This is after  seeing most of the adults in her village killed.
Listening to this tale, my incredulous question was “Does Jesus really expect me to not hate these people”?
For all the sins i have committed that i constantly have to go back to him for forgivness for, never have i once hurt another human being in that manner. To tuture, to kill, to rape………… Are we really supposed to forgive these ppl.

I know in Africa forgivness and reconciliation councils are all the rage…. but really…. are they just gonna get away with it.

The interviewer asked the girl, “Are you angry?”. “”Sometimes” she answered “But i am not angry at the ones who did this for they were children too who did not know better…. I am angry at the elders”.
But then who is to say these elsers were not raised to do this as well? who is to blame?….. who is responsible?…. i dont know.

Last night i watched Law abiding citizen, fabulous movie… but then my friend spoke about a close friend of hers who was executed last week because of a dispute. And then it hit me that every single person killed in that movie was important to someone….. they were no innocents they all had done bad things, but still……

It is a sad world we live in and i am constantly reminded that we humans are little more than savages.

The heart is willing…..

Alas, it would seem that i too am getting old.

In the past 3 weeks (or 4, I mix it up sometimes) I have caught the flu twice, been so sick that it scared me enough to go to the doctor (for those of you who dont know, I HATE going to the doctor, so ye I was pretty scared) and i now have constant laboured breathing (the mere fact that i notice it is alarming enough)

All this are signs that my body is cracking under the demands i have placed upon it, strangely enough i cant fathom why.

There is a part of me that wants a proper illness, that wants me to be bedridden just so that i have legitimate excuse to stop…. why?… because anything less would be unwarranted. I am surrounded by a culture of constant self sacrifice and martyrdom  at both pan and work, and i already feel like a bum.

Now mind you I know I DONT want to be bedridden… that I know for sure, but every time i get sick now-a-days, there is a sense of relief…. now i can get a chance to rest.

I think i have reached the point where i now need to change my lifestyle to maintain any semblance of health… most men get here after age 50 with the aid of nagging wives.  But in this I am lost, Nagging wives are very essential to a healthy lifestyle it seems (no i still don’t want to get married ) I have the desire to change but no idea what direction i should go in.

Me…(Right now)

The following statements are accurate for the duration of this post.

• Why am I here? Because i don’t want to be at home
• I am not unhappy, I am just tired
• Lyming…..not so appealing any more, but still kool
• Tired and easily annoyed
• Questions own level of incompetence and acknowledges one is FAR from superman
• Likes getting things done
• Works because it is safer than…….

Friends

“Don’t Follow fren!”

That was a common refrain I heard while growing up. It often referred to not letting your School work suffer because of those who you would hang out with.

But now that one is an adult one has to ask? what is more important your friends or your Job?
That, I have found, is not as clear cut.

The reality is one must find the balance, yet the balance is often elusive and we usually end up swinging from extreme to another (at least I do).

Mek Him Gwaan

The title speaks to a trait i have seen in some women… definitely in my mother and in other women who have been in relationships for prolonged periods of time.

It is the ability to know how to, as my mother says, “Pick your battles”.
As many women will attest to, men are prone to doing stupid things. Some women have the ability, however, to tolerate this “imbecilic” behavior. There are those who are born with a spirit of tolerance and long suffering that makes them predisposed to “putting up with his rubbish”, and there are others that will only learn through experience. This can be a painful process.

**** the world, Dont ask me for ****

There is something alluring about someone who keeps fighting against all odds.

♫ It is to You ♫ – Byron Cage

For some reason this song ALWAYS brings tears to my eyes…. to say it reaches me is an understatement.

It is to you i give the glory
It is to you i give the praise
For you have done so much for me
And i will bless your holy name
It is to you holy father no one like you
And i will bless your name
Bless your name
Bless your name forevermore

It is to you i give the glory
It is to you i give the praise
For you have done so much for me
And i will bless your holy name
It is to you holy father no one like you
And i will bless your name
Bless your name
And i will bless your name forevermore

It is to you i give the glory
It is to you i give the praise
Lord you have done so much for me
And i will bless your holy name

It is to you holy father no one like you
And i will bless your name
Bless your name
And i will bless your name
Bless your name
And i will bless your name
Bless your name
And i will bless your name
Bless your name
Bless your name
Bless your name
Bless your name forevermore

Resposibility

How responsible are you for someone else.

If you know carrying out a particular course of action is bad for them, is it incumbent on you to stop?
What if they know its bad for them and they don’t want you to stop, what then?

Lessons learned while at the gym.

Lesson 1.
Pride commeth before a muscle strain.

Reminded

Today i was reminded why i have chosen not to get married.